Humility

I've run into a few people recently asking me what I hope to 'do' in Uganda when I'm there. That's a question I am used to thinking about and answering. For the first time yesterday, I was asked what I will teach those I meet in Uganda.

I had to think about that one.

Well. I realized, I had little to 'teach' anyone in Uganda about anything...I am hoping my research does something to promote awareness and good policy for refugees living in Uganda and elsewhere. I want to look at why and how refugee camps become sites of conflict and violence, particularly as rebel groups use refugee resources to wage war. Maybe this will help governments, NGOs and agencies like the UNHCR devise better ways of assisting and protecting refugees....but what will I teach?

I told this acquaintance, James, (thanks, James, btw!) that I hoped to learn more than I hoped to teach. My instincts tell me, as they have all along, that I have far more to learn from the people of Uganda than I have to teach anything; despite my many years in school and all the formal training I have received...I think it is all coming down to a realization that real learning comes from being in relationship with people other than yourself or those within your comfort zone. And real teaching somehow, ironically, comes from willing to learn.

This sounds all vague, I know, but it feels like God is doing a lot of internal work in me right now, teaching me valuable lessons about living, loving and growing in faith. A major lesson among those I've already mentioned, is the importance of humility - another very intangible quality that keeps rearing its head in my heart and in my conscience.

Humility.

I realize that no matter what one sets out to do and accomplish, God sets out to do much more. And there is a fine line between accomplishing one's own mission or goals and wanting to be used in the service of His mission and purposes.

"Seek first His kingdom and all these things shall be added unto you."

"The man who loves his life will lose it, while the man who hates his life in this world will keep it for eternal life." John 12:22

"I tell you the truth, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. Therefore, whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven." Matthew 18:2-4

Something about being like a child seems effortless and irresponsible, but in all the searching, doing and preparing, I'm realizing how dependent I am on the help of others and how little I can do or be without God's protection, grace, mercy and love.
How do we forget to be like children? What does it take to remember?

A miracle.

Well all would be hopeless except for one thing Jesus said: "What is impossible for man, is possible with God."